SxSW 2013: The One Punch Knockout
Quick - What's going to be the most talked about app, secret show, performance etc ... from SXSW 2013? Based on the following video I think it will be the one punch knockout in front of the Library bar (I think).
In my years of going to bars on 6th Street, I saw quite a few fights but I never saw a one punch knockout. Most of the time two guys would end up tackling each other and rolling on the ground before APD came to break it up ... which is why I love this video so much. I just wish I could have been there in person to see this happen so that I could validate the last unchecked item on my 6th Street bucket list.
Some of you may also know that Austin has a problem with random beatdowns on East 6th as part of a gang initiation. That's not cool but this is because this guy totally had it coming and when that punch lands, the feeling is quite palpable.
Lexus SUV? Check. External SUV Rack with Dead Pig? Check.
Sorry for the quality, iPhone was dead so had to use a Razr.
Affliction Shirts Banned at The Ranch
What happens when a bar that's known for its "Affliction" crowd suddenly bans graphic tees? Awesomeness.
The Ranch, a bar along West 6th (where I also met Luke and Owen Wilson) has informally been known as an "Affliction Bar" - a place where 50 year old men trying to recapture their youth and 20 somethings trying to act tough paraded their flaming skulls, playing cards, swords and gothic lettering in front of the local ladies.
That changed sometime recently and I want to say congratulations to Ranch because they finally get it. Affliction shirts aren't cool, they've never been cool and will never be cool. MMA fighters don't wear them because they want to look tough because they don't need to ... their job in life is beating people. They just get paid $$$ for the sponsorship.
The past few UFC fights, I've seen some people turned away because of their tees. While most of them went quietly, a few predictably played the "tough guy" card or "DO YOU KNOW WHO I AM?" card in a desperate attempt to gain entry. Thankfully Ranch ain't havin' none of it so cheers to 'em!
I'm so happy with the decision that I will honestly go to Ranch in the future and buy a drink, even by myself, just to support the cause.
PS: Austin's "douchiest bar" (believe me ask any woman with an IQ and real boobs) is still by far Malaia.
Austin’s Cleverest Furniture Store
Why am I writing about a furniture store? Well last Saturday I went downtown during the day and stumbled upon IF+D at the AMLI.
Imagine this: Going into a furniture store that has items that resemble something I would make if I had the proper tools at my disposal. In fact when I walked in, the woman who owns the store was building a catapult right there in the store. In fact you should visit the web site, not to buy anything (it costs $$$$), but just read the individual descriptions for products (these are the actual descriptions, no edits).
Examples:
Bar Stool by Blue Dot
"it kind of reminds me of chair chair and counterstool counterstool. i’m not sure why. hmmm. although tall, it’s still suitable for throwing at geraldo rivera’s face."
Forest Light
"smokey the bear, aka forest ranger, wants you to prevent forest fires. prevent them with lighting the forest with a lightbulb. forget fires. fires burn trees and smokey likes trees."
Jane Sofa
"I’m going to detroit next week. should i pack a scarf and a wool hat? i’ve heard it’s cold in detroit. and boy, the lions sure had a terrible season. but don’t ask kristen about the lions… she’ll talk your ear off."
Carter Sectional
"the classic lines of high modernism provide you with a noble seat from which to ponder. whether it is your upcoming meeting with anwar sadat, memories of your georgia peanut farming days, or the germ of an idea of an organization to provide habitats for humanity, the carter sofa is perfect."